Tuesday, November 2, 2010

Let It Go

What I hoped would be impossible. My creative energy has been at a stalemate for the last few weeks. I broke my ankle and then someone broke my heart. So now I am dealing with fixing things both physical and spiritual. Trust me when I say I had days when I wanted to give up. What is it like when you are faced with blatant rejection and serious disappointment? I've done the pajama and uncombed hair thing. I have called 100 friends to help me in this time. Seriously I truly understand all those songs that make u want to cry in the bathroom and take a few valium....I must say I do not always shy away from the truth of my feelings. I had big plans and hopes and when you have to let a dream go....that is the hardest part. So my goal today is to reach out to all of you because the creative process in everything we do suffers when we suffer. As one well known artist has said "as artists we are eternally brokenhearted" and I agree totally with that statement. I gotta tell you that I am not afraid. I am not afraid. I am truly blessed because God has given me countless people who have loved me through everything. My vow today is to take back the power I once had and to remember that I am the daughter of a king. I meditated today and in my mind I saw an image of myself in a small boat leaving the shore of a lake. I saw my wet feet climb into the boat and watched my hands push off from the shore...To let go that is all you have to do...get in the boat and push off the shore...where u go from there is what is called your future, your hope and a new beginning.. Embrace your fear and let it go..Like Erykah Badu sang.."all you must hold on to is you"...Let It Go....Peace and Grace.


Loose Sparrow Arts N Crafts said...

Oh, Cindy, I am so sorry to hear about your broken heart and ankle. My husband of 35 years just kicked me out of the house because he falsely believes I cheated on him. My heart is broken too, and I haven't been able to create or blog since late August. Can we keep each other in our thoughts? Your visual of the boat leaving the shore and heading into the future helps me, too. Love and prayers!

Cindy said...

Loose Sparrow, hugs to you. Sorry for you to be going through all that. Love and prayers. Please e-mail me :)